How to live with uncertainty

  1. Acknowledge you do not know everything. Embrace being a lifelong learner.

  2. Accept that the way you imagine it will be, will be different.

  3. Find beauty in mystery, surprise, experience of wordlessness, and the distance of time.

  4. Knowing the outcome before its occurrence is humanly impossible.

  5. Know you will not always have a way to describe what you are trying to articulate.

  6. You will never know the wisdom of your future self before you’re there.

  7. Accept uncertainty as a foundation of life.

    © Victoria Venturella, MA, Wait a Meta, Existential Dialogues



The Power of The Future Not Yet

There is a path from here to there paved in reels of undeveloped film.

You are the only one who will ever see it the way you experienced it.

You get to keep all the pictures.

You can choose which way to go

but you’ll never be for certain the future of not yet.


Life lives in mystery, love, and what’s not yet known.


The power of the future not yet.

© Victoria Venturella, MA, The Existentialist, Existential Dialogues

Moon Clock

Moon Clock

In full vulnerability

Illuminating bright

Luminescence.

You see yourself glimmer

In the gaze of the Other.

Temporal rotation.

Within a shadow

We meet ourselves.

Where are we?

With myself how do I see myself?

In thought? On the page? In a recording?

In my reflections of my recent experiences.

I see myself in you. I see you in myself.

Part of each other’s present evolution.

You no longer are where you were.

One section of chapters becoming the palate to paint the next section.

Opening my evolution from the page I am on today.

Moon Clock

Time to illuminate the world to reveal who we are to ourselves.

Without the world who would we be?

How could we see who we are without all that exists beyond us?

We would be nothing without the world.


© Victoria Venturella, MA, The Existentialist, Existential Dialogues

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Time Vanishes Promptly Easily Finding Yourself in a Creative Headspace

Having ADHD allows for us to experience the world from infinite angles.

We must learn how to navigate in this terrain, while cherishing who you are.

You see the world from a unique individual perspective, as we all do.

How can we best create your everyday landscape to experience all your gifts to their fullest potentiality?

When we recognize the situation or thing differently, that never inherently means that what you see is wrong. How you experience the situation allows for you to see things in a unique way. An idea comes to you. Quickly you search for a pen. While the words briskly begin to leave you. You’ve moved on to something else. Which later prompts you to search for something in a different room.

Time vanishes promptly easily finding yourself in a creative headspace. Splashing loudly in a completely new project equally intriguing.

We just need to learn how to navigate such a landscape that grabs so much of our undivided attention.

Achieving a consistent state of timelessness is something to cherish. How can you fit it in without letting the other areas of your life suffer?

How can we better manage our time to manifest our big ideas?

Pausing with life as it draws your attention is something to be valued.

How can you incorporate the way you see the world while adhering to societal norms and systems that were built for the collective majority?

There is nothing wrong with needing more time for things.

Everyone in the world could read the same book and we would all have different perspective on it.

You are with yourself for your entire life.

Pay attention to what works best for you. Honor what you need to live into your fullest potential. Never hinder the others capacity to become their best selves too. For me to be free you must be free.

What are all your living projects?

The ones that continue onward, and never seem to be finished?


© Victoria Venturella, MA, The Existentialist, Existential Dialogues

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Making Errors is Part of What Makes Us a Perfect Human

Who defines perfect?

Who defines your imperfections?

Society leaves space for human error because it’s a given that human beings will potentially miss something in any given circumstance.

You can try to excel at something, lower the potentiality for making a mistake in this or that. You can attempt to perfect what you or society consider imperfections. But the mere fact that these imperfections exist are absolutely what makes you a perfect human.

Would you be human without error?

Being a perfect human accounts for the potentiality of not knowing, not seeing, not hearing, not understanding, memory misalignment. While at the same time we have lots of resources out there to help us learn, get on track, inform ourselves, to make better choices. Even if you were an expert in the field at something, there is always the potential for not having noticed something, doesn’t mean you won’t notice it later, and if someone pointed it out to you right now you would integrate it into what you know seamlessly.

There isn’t a human being that exists that doesn’t warrant grace for human error. Therefore, making errors is part of what makes us a perfect human.

Let’s consider what society deems as perfect, or what you consider as perfect. Someone who is perfect knows how to show up at all social situations, can pick up on every social cue and respond effectively, can feel into their emotions, can master every single thing they try on the first attempt, can beat everyone at everything, you name it they will win it, can raise perfect children just like themselves, can be everywhere at the exact same moment, can satisfy all the needs of everyone they know at the same time, practices self-care, takes on new hobbies, pursues all their passions and excels at every single one of them, gets exceptional sleep nightly, wakes up with a pep in their step onto the kitchen to make an amazing breakfast that fulfills all the nutrients needed to jump start the day, can pick up on all social cues as if they are a mind reader and know exactly how to respond to the other to where they can be just as supportive as they are needing to be, never gets sick, the body and mind coincide until late age and body depletion never hinders what they want to pursue in late life, they know every answer to everything, they can win every talk show, they remember everything they have been through in life and having exceptional recall, they photograph books into their brain and file them away for easy access later, nothing they ever cook tastes off and never burns, they never trip walking up the stairs, they always know where they are going, they never accidently add something together wrong, they learned every foreign language, and can speak it fluently to native cultures, they give excellent massages and have the capacity to be emotionally supportive to everyone in the world in the same way a therapist can to a select number of clients without conflict of interest, their attachment style is completely secure regardless of how they were treated as a child, the trauma they experience in the world is processed on their own in their own head, everything can be articulated and nothing is too complicated, they write all the New York Times best sellers, writes prolific poetry, graduates Cum Laude after choosing from any of all schools they were accepted into, never gets into a car accident, upholds a physique that never wavers no matter what they eat or whether they work out or not, never not thinks of a possible option to why something may be the way that it is, they can instantly consider all the potential possibilities with all possible outcomes and make a choice on the spot without having to sleep on it, they remember everyone’s birthday, they know every holiday in every culture by heart, calls all their friends and family in a sufficient amount of time to maintain close relationships, never kills a plant they pot, never leaves the oven on, never gets sun burned, they can also hear everything around them perfectly as if each thing is isolated on its own within every situation, there is not room for any error.

© Victoria Venturella, MA, The Existentialist, Existential Dialogues

#perfection

#imperfection

#beingperfect

#makingmistakes

#humanerror

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Free Fall into the Universe

Even when it feels like the ground no longer exists below you,

And the outcome seems infinitely uncertain,

Allow yourself to free fall into the universe of the unknown.


So much will come from your willingness to find out what will one day be.


Be with the mystery,

Love fully even with the potential heartbreak,


New choices lead us somewhere else.


Live freely.


Live loudly.


Live into your fullest potential in life.


© Victoria Venturella, MA, The Existentialist, Existential Dialogues

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Gone long enough for home to feel foreign and familiar at the same time

Long enough to lose my rhythm,

Experience a completely new one.

When the space you created

Was with you anywhere you existed.

Being with what the experience is giving us.

Adaptation with known impermanence

Savor every unique sliver of those moments.

Your home is where you create it, but it starts

In your inner self.

Even your home can become foreign the longer you exist away from it,

Familiarity caught within all the things that have shifted for me.

Every corner reveals potentiality.

New visions are coming to me, ideas that must be written.


Home.


This is a place you create.


An empty canvas to slouch paint all over.


You build your shelter and continuously invent it.


You are the creator of your life.


Like a glimmer on a crystal rock,

Light brings out the sparkles from

Infinite angles.

© Victoria Venturella, MA, The Existentialist, Existential Dialogues

#createyourownlife

#manifest

#curiosity

#youareunique

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#victoriaventurella

#relationshipwithself #communication #transcendence

#futureself #infinitepossibilities

#existentialpsychotherapy

You didn't go through all that to be treated like this

You are a warrior. You persevered. You overcame so much to be right here where you are today.

Be proud.

Stand up for yourself.

If how you are being treated doesn't feel right, don't ignore it.

Don't ignore yourself.

You changed your whole life. You healed. You conquered.

It's not over. Life keeps going. You must continue to prevail.

Celebrate yourself. One day someone may celebrate you for all you are while existing beside you.

Never stop being your biggest hero.


After all those burning houses you rescued yourself from, how could you lay down while the walls disintegrate post flame?


Charred.


Scorched.


Still present.


Here you are.

© Victoria Venturella, MA, The Existentialist, Existential Dialogues

#dontignoreyourself

#theydontcare

#keepgoing

#moveon

#triumph

#perserverance

#presence

#beingseen

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#courage

Caption- [You didn't go through all that to be treated like this]

#existentialangst

#angst

#hereandnow

#whatsatstake

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#victoriaventurella

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#futureself #infinitepossibilities

#existentialpsychotherapy

Read Something that Provokes you to Read More

What illuminates for you when you see me, is something I could never see of myself.

Gliding along the surface keeping our eyes out for what shimmers in our ever-shifting temporal constellation. If we are to discover anything new along the way to where we are going, we must be open to change. I must be open to the idea that something beyond me right now could change me; anything other than me that I interact with has the power to change me.

You need the freedom to take a moment to read something when it provokes you to read more.

You continue to re-arrange your internal bookshelf, making space for the next must read.


When will you give yourself the space to learn freely?


Why must you always be doing something else when something over here sparked your curiosity?


Only in the preservation of art, does it extend beyond the experience it was originally created in. It is in the experience we consciously occupy that we are drawn into the ideas that were once written. We mingle in the space that exists between the book and our mind as it leads us into an unescapable dialogue with ourselves in an adventurous form. Experiential moments that render time transform us, because if something moves you, it shows you something in relation to yourself.

© Victoria Venturella, Existential Dialogues, The Existentialist

#readmore

#read

#reading

#maketime

#makespace

#beproductive in all of life.

#freedom

#internaldialogue

#letsgo

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#victoriaventurella

#relationshipwithself #communication #transcendence

#futureself #infinitepossibilities

#existentialpsychotherapy

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If you keep it all inside, you’ll never hear yourself say it.

If you never say it out loud then you won’t benefit from hearing yourself say it. Especially when someone else is listening simultaneously helping you to see it.


Other people show us ourselves.


When you say something out loud to the other, you hear yourself say it. Something happens when you acknowledge what you just said.


When you see that I see. The response to what is said is experienced verbally and non-verbally suspending all judgement. Bringing something to you in the purest form of authenticity for the betterment of who you are becoming.


The experiences you have stay with you. An interaction between you two arrives as a kodak moment at some unfamiliar juncture in a future present moment.


Every experience summons previous experiences. Whether consciously or unconsciously we make sense of what we are experiencing in the here and now. Unfamiliarity instantly reveals itself along the ambiguous edges of what we automatically find familiar. Sitting in the garden room anchored top of minds edge. Thoughts blossom rapidly in the immediacy of what is known as known and unknown. Questions take a seat, front row. They raise their hands pointing all over a map of meaning pressed deeply in minds wall. Full scenes and flashes of just one part dive into the deep end of our heart. Simultaneously placing our experience and our interpretations upon the present in ways we could not completely see for ourselves.


Every immediate connection in a present instance is not known. You will never know for certain what within the periphery of your focal point will reappear at some foreign unknown future present situation.


Questions come from and are answered through imagination. You would not have been able to conjure up such a plausible possibility had you not considered what could be based on what is. What is always includes part of what is not yet known. Even what is known can one day be known as something else. We must leave space in every present moment for the future to show us an unknown unknown. You can proceed with full certainty that you do not know everything. The ocean’s perpetual mystery and the endless ambiguity found in the universe existing beyond us, gives you uncertainty you can rely on. Human beings evolve. You can be for certain something manmade will exist in the future that may or may not advance our species, remaining forever unknown to you.
© Victoria Venturella, Existential Dialogues, The Existentialist

Do not regret what you have done: Existence precedes essence

Every experience you have lived thus far contributes to the human being you are today. If you had the power to change your previously lived experiences, it would change who you have come to be and potentially the trajectory of how you have lived your life. You may not have been driven to study the things you have, your interests may have been different, you may not have found yourself in the specific relationships you have encountered. You may not know your children as they are, maybe you did not have children. Your personality and the way you relate to the world would no longer exist as you currently experience it.

You are born into a world that is not of your choosing. You cannot decide who your parents are, where you grow up geographically, what your name is, how you will be educated, what kinds of interactions you will observe, how you will be punished or treated, if you will be respected, protected, and loved. As a child you cannot choose to forego abuse, neglect, and any other traumatic experiences. These experiences shape how you interact with the world and become the backdrop you unconsciously and consciously pull from when making sense of the present situation across a lifetime. In fact, it is highly likely that you will grow up to believe the way you were treated is how one is to be treated. Until one day your awareness shifts in your cognitive maturation, when you witness opposition in the way others respond to you and world. Holding yourself in contempt for the choices made before and after your cognitive faculties fully develop prevents you from embracing your whole self in its truest form in each present moment. You cannot separate yourself from who you have come to be. You can only move forward.

When we move into adulthood, we become the agent of our lives. Your choices are now only yours to make. These choices are grounded in the understandings of what you have come to know up until this point. It is up to you to utilize the resources within the world to discover what is known beyond you.

Whenever you are making a choice, pay attention to what is present within you. That internal voice is your authentic internal dialogue. Let yourself engage with the back-and-forth movement of thought. When you make choices that align with your moral compass and you choose choices that are authentically sound, you will never regret the life you have chosen to live. If you could stand behind the choices you make completely for where you are in this moment of time when the choices were made, then how could you regret the choices you have made if you honor your present and past self with compassion?

To love yourself completely you must love everything you have been through. Even the things that cause you to feel embarrassed or shameful. You will forever depart from yourself. If you depart from a place of love and compassion you will paint your external landscape in similar hues of wonder.

Author: Victoria Venturella, Existential Phenomenological Psychotherapist

© Victoria Venturella, Existential Dialogues, The Existentialist

Expect the Unexpected

You can count on there being something unknown about every given situation. You cannot be for certain what someone will say. How the meeting will go. When you will receive a phone call, or an email, or a knock on your door. You cannot know how a relationship will evolve, if you will get married, if you will have children, if it will all work out as you hope.

You cannot know exactly how you will feel 10 years from now about this specific subject matter. You may have evolved so far beyond where you are right now that you have a completely new perspective.

Everything between now and the next moment is undetermined. We cannot control the weather. We can not control the response of others.


We do have control over how we respond to the situation. The situation could play itself out as we had imagined it would, or not. You can strive to get to where you aspire to be, and you may just get there. Proceed as if you will.


Proceed as if it will work out.


Just know that one thing is for certain, you cannot know for certain what will occur in the future. We can depend on ambiguity to perpetually exist in all parts of life.

© Victoria Venturella, Existential Dialogues, The Existentialist

#presentsituation

#control #respond

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